Humiliation, Harassment, and Assault: The First Steps To Any Great Vacation!
77
The TSA has taken airport security to a whole new level: 'Enhanced' Insanity!
TSA Agent: "What dat in yo pants, sir?"
Passenger: "That would be my penis, ma'am."
And, not only was said protruding penis pointed out and discussed publicly - its existence was also verified privately - before its horrified owner was allowed to board a plane to paradise!
A funny little anecdote - except when you consider that YOU could be next! The new 'enhanced' airport security measures are being called nothing short of 'legal' assault - and public outrage is growing!
Especially when one factors in that the average TSA agent requires nothing more than a high school education - and earns about $14.00 to $18.00 an hour!
These 'enhanced' protocols can be so invasive as to leave sexual deviants envious, molesters breathless - and pedophiles furiously submitting resumes!
The truth of the matter is - they OWN you - and you pay top dollar for the privilege!
Here is but a smattering of eye-opening, jaw-dropping examples of the TSA's growing power and authority - and the innovative ways in which they manage to abuse it:
- Lori Dorn went through the airport scanner and was found to have strangely shaped prosthesis in her breasts. She explained that she had just had a double mastectomy and the surgeons had left material in both breasts which would allow her to have reconstructive surgery. She was not allowed to get the medical card from her luggage which would verify this assertion, and was forced to either undergo and hands-on examination - or miss her flight!
Lori made her flight. You do the math.
- Lenore Zimmerman - a dangerous looking 85 year old grandmother - was pulled from her wheelchair and strip searched - panties down to her dangerous 85 year old ankles! They bashed her leg with her own wheelchair and left her bleeding. They then called her a liar by denying the strip search ever happened!
Lenore made her flight, but her first stop was to a doctor, her second was to bed - and her third was to the media!!
- A mother was arrested at Nashville's International Airport and thrown in jail. Her crime? Trying to stop TSA agents from performing an 'enhanced' pat-down of her daughter. The daughter's age is omitted, but rumored to be very young. Perhaps even under the age of 6 - the 'approved' age to begin 'enhanced' pat-downs.
They missed their vacation.
- A 17 year old was detained because there was a gun embroidered on her purse. Yes - you read that correctly -she got through security with flying colors, but was harassed because of embroidery! She told them that she had traveled many times with the same purse - but - that was like speaking Latin to Russians! She was given the choice of checking it - or surrendering it!
The process caused her to miss her flight!
- Growing numbers of black women are complaining of being utterly humiliated by being forced to submit to their hair being poked, prodded, and patted down - AFTER being scanned without incident!
Can you say the 'R' word? Cause they sure 'R'!
While we all understand the need for security - these few examples leaves one wondering where exactly the lines are drawn between national security, personal integrity - and, oh yeah - those pesky 4th amendment rights!
If you are considering looking up the exact rules and regulations that the TSA operates under - allow me to save you a bit of time and trouble. Here are the first two!
1. TSA laws are secret and the general public is not privvy to them.
2. TSA laws are subject to change at any time with no notice (See Regulation 1.)
Be afraid! Be very, very afraid!
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Thanks for stopping by! Y'all come back now ya hear!
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CommentsLoading...
@flickr: Thanks so much. Now..how do i do links? lol
Greedy girl wants to know...
Good story, I'm sure law suits will be filed soon.
Lawsuits??? Against this little ole article? Lol..just kidding - I get it..
links are under edit as well, on the right hand side. Amazon, pictures more text boxes. they'll pop up at the bottom of your hub you're editing and you'll click edit and and then copy and past your link in the url spot.
Thanks Philly!
Thanks Flickr! One last question: how to get pictures where i want them in my hub? thanks!
pictures as far as i can tell can only be put on the right hand side of your hub or centered as a larger picture(s) throughout your hub.
I saw one TSA agent open a woman's purse, take out her billfold, and count her money! The supervisor was called and she told the moron that it was not allowed.
Do you feel safer?
how much safer could one possibly feel? lol..Thanks for stopping by Will Starr!
I enjoyed reading your experience and point of view.
Tags are the keywords. Keywords and keyphrase are the words that people type when they are searching for something on the internet.
lol..Oh, yes Will! Warm and fuzzy all over. kinda like having strange hands all over my body..LOL. Hope you enjoyed!
Thanks Vinaya..i figured out how to add keywords..i'm used to adding a comma at the end of each, and that's a no no here...
This was brilliant - and horrifying at the same time.
Excellent first hub. Now it's time for ME to get going and write a hub myself!
Lovely to talk to you on Hub Pages. We're friends all over the place now? You on redgage? If you are, send me a message and I'll friend you.
Hi, Sheila! Nope, not on redgage! I can only handle 1 at a time...or..in this case 1 1/2..lol
Wow, not sure what is better between the information and the presentation. You are a unique hubber.
Great first hub, ImKarn23, Voted up and awesome. Looking forward to more.
Thanks very very much tammy..i had no idea what to expect! Youève made me feel welcome...Warm again!
scarytaff - you have made my day. i moved here from a site where i really enjoyed the community - but had principle issues with the management - or lack thereof. It was a tough decision! Thank you!
Hi, great first hub! I realised that American security at airports was really hard, but not this hard! wow! I read on the forum the other day somebody from England was stopped actually getting into America because of something they put on Twitter! talk about big brother watching you. I know it was something stupid they said, but it turned out to be the old, England and America divided by a common language thing! just a stupid English saying that the security got the wrong idea about!
Vote up awesome and funny my friend. I wish you the best of luck here and remember what I told you.
i will...join us..try again!
Nell..so sorry that i haven't replied to your comment! I'm new and i'm directionally impaired..lol. Please forgive me and come again? Good!
Hi! Karen
Enjoyed very much these descriptions, mainly your style otherwise these are so sad and ugly affairs.
I read both your articles. You indeed exactly are as you mention in your profile
"I use humor and sarcasm to get me through the day (can you tell?), I adore my dog, tolerate my kids, and enjoy poker, Harley's, yoga, dancing - and writing!"
Enjoy writing and we enjoy reading.
I re wrote my profile after reading others here. Wanna re-check it? Hope it makes you smile!
Great well written first hub, i enjoyed reading it. You done a great job writing your first hub,looking forward to reading more of your hubs.
Vote up !!!
Thanks so much Kashmir! Very encouraging for a hP newbie!
Great first hub ImKarn23, funny, scary, and true, and not in that particular order. It's got to be hard doing that job, there are so many sick people in the world that would use their 6 year old to smuggle bombs or there grandmother to hide drugs, how do you know who is who. I'm not saying the TSA is right, I'm just saying??? Good hub voted up and interesting, welcome to Hubpages :) Tags look good.
lol..thanks about the tags, eddie! truth be told, i had a friend help me, but..i learn fast. Appreciate you taking the time to spend with me and hope you're 'interested' enough to spend some more!
I'm so reluctant to fly because of these new policies. I just don't want to deal with it!
Exactly, Natasha! That's why i flew direct from canada to mexico, and by-passed the worst of it the US..
I like your style ImKarn23 and thanks so much for the follow:-) I love flying but going through the USA has been over 25 years ago when things weren't this stressed out.
Just one tip for your first Hub. The content is great, good quality for sure but it would be much better even if you use fewer words in bold.
Love your sense of humor by the way! Voted up, shared and away!
@Escobana: Thanks for taking the time to read and comment! I appreciate the advice, as well! I'm a Libra - I take constructive criticism well! LOL
You listed why I haven't flown since 2008 and drive across the country to visit my family instead of flying. I will not be VIOLATED! Grrr. It's scary what "rights" TSA has. I will do everything I can to avoid airports. Great first hub! Voted up and SOCIALLY SHARED.
Gotta Tweet this one.
@rosettaartist1: Love ya, hon! Thanks!
...and the saying used to be: 'Join the navy and feel a man.'
Perhaps it needs to be redirected for the TSA?
Fab work!
@dazzlejazz: lol..i think that's 'feel LIKE a man', but...i kinda like your take on it better!
May I suggest to you that "newest first" comments are not the norm here or anywhere else on the Internet?
Check around.. It's considered confusing by most..
@Pcunix: Yes, suggest away. And when you're finished suggesting - please tell me what you mean and then suggest how a technically inept hubber can rectify it. Thanks...and thanks for taking the time..
What I mean is that you have these comments set to display newest first. Around the web and around here, most display newest last so that they read in order. It's in your Global comment settings and each capsule.
@Pcunix: Thanks so much!!!!!!!! Ya only gotta tell me twice...Thanks!
Great hub ImKarn23. In Australia the Government is about to use technology that will allow the scanners to see through clothing for concealed weapons. The consensus is that it won't be long before we start seeing images on the web after some security breach. Also love the t-shirt - Second base...got to get one of these! Cheers Michael
@charmike4: Hi, Mike! Thanks for taking the time to read and comment! Only through the clothes? I'm surprised they can't see the sex of the unborn yet! It's out of control, and it is often just plain assault. I'm all for security but these examples and far too many others are unacceptable! Y'all come back now, ya hear, Mike?
I feel neglected?
I agree. Air travel is getting worse with each passing decade and the TSA isn't helping. Voting this Up and Interesting.
Hub-a, Hub-a, @imKarn23. Super article from a keen and witty author.
Ms. L. this hub gave me reason to do the shudder lap dance. Although I do not travel frequently so far it has been without incident with the exception of my Intimacy Bra Boutique bra's wires setting of the alarms on the xray scanner once. I guess the heafty price of the those bras comes with a chunk of metal to lift and seperate, which is exactly what the woman pat down personell wanted to do. Holy Moly, who would have thought sexual exposure could take on a new definition centering around and in an airport terminal. It is ironic how you can just waltz on a train or bus and travel cross country but boats, and airplanes require so much touchy feeling hand play these days. Awesome submisson!!!
@picadilly: Ahhhh...to even require lifting and separating...lol..
Thanks for taking the time and for the kind words! It is nothing less than frightening...where can we go from here, me wonders...(shudder)
Oh, ImKarn you are such a wit. I love to read your articles. You have such a sense of humour and are so observant about the world around you and the people in it. Found this on RedGage. Come visit me there too??
@sheilanewton: If you are trying to flatter me - you are succeeding. How can i not take your kind words to heart when they come from a talented woman such as yourself? Hmmm? Tell me that...lol. I wonder if your opinion will remain the same after you read todays offering. OMG..it comes with a warning..fyi..
Great hub! Keep it up!
Haven't ever gone through a pat down but . . . left Phoenix with a cosmetic bottle that I was stopped for on the way back from North Carolina . . . .?! Have also been "pulled over" due the presence of extremely dangerous metal on my barrette and bra straps (eye roll).
Yep, feeling safer . . . NOT!
I love your writing style. You always make me laugh. vote up awesome! I can see that the frisk airport check has gotten more up close and personal.
I'm not surprised at all the comments, after the great lead-in! ;o) And with all of that we are not totally secure, nor could we afford to be. Decaff coffee when I come. I have not been known to nod off.
HAHA. Laugh and the world laughs with you, cry and you cry alone. We can either laugh at this or cry! Perhaps both at the same time. Amazing, what a little bit of power can do, great article, good topic choice.
Boy oh boy! U sure know how to churn out good, funny hubs. I think i'll b very busy tonight perusing all ur hubs
Is all this in the name of "Homeland security", god help us where all doomed.
Voted up and interesting. Perhaps the law should be changed so that a person can get to the airport around at least four hours before their flight dressed in a bathing suit. Can't hide much there, can you? Once checked in they can get dressed properly and calmly await their flight. No? Or am I missing the whole point here. I mean what could a woman be possibly hiding under her bikini???? Won't go over big with the older generation though. lol Well done Leslie.
@Brianslater: Hi, Brian! Absolute power corrupts absolutely, it seems. I watched a show last night that said that turnover for TSA agents is about 50%, and that the gov't advertises for agents ON THE TOPS OF PIZZA BOXES.One woman said an agent actually touched her vagina, another woman had to remove a SOILED adult diaper, etc, etc, etc..From pizza boxes to vaginas - whadda world!
@Gypsyroselee: LOL. Funny you should mention that! Did ya hear about the man who recently stripped nekkid to go thru airport security - to prove a point? He was arrested and thrown in jail! Apparently, you're not supposed to strip until ordered to! Hmmmm...remind you of another time in history?...omg..it'd be hilarious - if it were the fantasy it SHOULD be. The reality?
Not so funny, eh?
haven't forgotten
@martin: Thank, hon! Waaaay out of touch for a bit - don't have my own computer..
Flickr 3 months ago
OUT OUTRAGEOUS that such things occur in the land of the free....well done, like the hub. you can add tags on the right hand side of your post, just type in what you would like to tag and hit enter, you can tag as many things as you like. You can also add tags by editing your post, on the right hand side there will be a box with the options of - recorder - tags - settings, just click tags and tag. hope it helps.